.....

la la la la... what should i say for this week? i really no idea.

i blog if i have something to say

why all like this??

maybe becoz of my dad in hospital, recently, i find everything i do in life so meaningless.

looking at the old people laying in the beds in TTSH, somehow i cant help thinking that one day i might be one of them.

i cant imagine by then what would i have become. have i achieved what i want in life? have i live a meaningful life.

wait.... what kind of life is a meaningful life? this i really dunno.

my currently job, i dun dislike it, neither do i like it. what is the next step that i should take. days pass by one after another. have i learnt anything? have i achieve something? its seems time pass really fast.

the other day when i was in a meeting, a boring one. i was looking at the clock on the wall. the second hand is moving so quickly. 1, 2, 3, 4, .... 59, 60. 1 min has pass. what i have done? wasting time in a stupid meeting.

im 25 this year. mid-twenties already. what do i have? nothing proud to mention about. friends getting married, one by one. me? i dun even have a normal friend of the opposite sex that i talk to, so dun even have to tok about girlfriend

my current social circle is so small, yet i have no time to do something about it.

one week = 7 days. mon - fri, morning to evening = work. after work = visit dad in hospital or go home. sat & sun, morning to late evening, visit dad in hospital.

yes, im still worried about my dad. everytime i fear of losing him, but i dunno what to do. i can relax only when he is back to what he was in the past. but now, i cant. sometimes, my mind all blank.

a good example is now. i believe you guys must be wondering what this stupid guy by the name of jason is blogging about. all make no sense.. all in my brain, but nothing is processing. like all jammed there.

although my dad is getting better, but he still has to wear a oxygen mask becoz his breathing is not good. i dunno how long he would be able to get down to walk. his stomach so big, i wonder will there be a day that he can manage to slim down

my dad, he a very hardworking n smart man. work all his life, make a lot of money for us. he achieve alot in his career. but he suffer in health.

so what if one can earn alot of money when u cant enjoy life? maybe my dad enjoy his work. but i really hope he can retire after this. enjoy life abit. be like those happy old man taking care of grandchilden or have kopi at coffee shops, talk with a couple of good old friends. have no worries at all. healthy n strong.

sometimes i feel i failed as a son. i feel like didnt do enough to stop my dad from ruining his health. i feel useless when all i can do now is to look at my dad lying on the hospital all day long and i cant do anything to help. now it seems like all i can do is wait.

Dad please get well soon.

Dad is back to general ward

Today, dad was transferred back to the general ward that he was located when he was first admitted. Looking better today, but he started to ask for this n that, for example food.

We explained that he had to learn to start eating less salty, and less sweet food and get used to it. He got to get rid of his huge stomach. But he's just like a spolit kid. Throw temper n talk rubblish. Make my auntie, my mum and I so fustrated.

Why doesn't he learn after he had gone through so much? We almost lost him and thank god, he recovered, but why doesn't he realise that all this is because of his previous lifestyle which he must now change in order not to let history repeats itself.

So headache u know, I really dont know how to make him understand.

He's still the same. Doesn't listen to anyone. He thinks he is his own doctor. All our efforts, our worries, he just cast it all aside. My poor mum, got to put up with all his nonsense. I try my best to help. My brothers and relatives too.

But most importantly, he must first help himself. If not, I fear for the worse.

Some fotos.

1) Taken with meizhen and the rest of my development team in our office on meizhen's last day. The one in blue on the left is our team leader.



2) Taken with meizhen on her last day.





Today, dad's looking really good. The doc even say he will be able to transfer to the general ward. That's really good news. =)


Extra: Added links to Jolin's blog and Rainie's blog

Thank God

Thank god my dad doing well now. The doc says he can eat n drink now, but got to be on strict diet, meaning not able to eat everything he wants.

But my dad, being a impatient man, keeps on asking for water, and wanting to eat this n eat that, giving a lot of trouble to the nurses.

But I really feel alot more relaxed. Most importantly he is is much alright now.

Dad getting better

Thank god, my dad's getting better. But still in ICU. Still have other problems. Hopefully he can be transferred to a normal ward soon.

SO happy to see him moving his hands and legs around, keep asking the nurses for water. He cant drink alot coz he got some water retention in his body. Moreover with his breathing mask, his mouth must be very dry. So keep asking for water.


Really tired these past few days, but my dad must have felt a lot worse. Hope that he would bear with it and listen to the doctors and nurses and get well soon.

God please help my dad

My life has gone completely upside down now. My dad is in TTSH ICU. don't wish to say more.

I just hope my dad will be fine.

God please give me a chance to take care of my dad, as he has taken care of me for almost 25 years already.

Its really painful to see him like that. So i beg u god, please lend my dad a hand. He has been a great man, a great father to me. He deserve alot better things like this.

Please please god, please bless him to recover too. Thank you god.

Bye bye Meizhen

Seems like only yesterday that I blogged, but actually 5 days had passed liao. Time really flies.

Yesterday was my colleague, meizhen's last day. She treated our whole department with yummy yummy beard papa's cream puffs from bugis junction. Was quite sad when she was packing her stuff and preparing to leave us for good. Never met such a gentle girl like her before. Talk very softly and never seems to have any temper at all. Sometimes a bit blur blur, so kinda cute. Always wear a smile on her face, really brighten up the office alot. Too bad, she is attached already, if not....

Well, never mind, wish her the very best in whatever she does in future lah.

Took some pictures with her before she left, will upload them later.

Boring weekend, coz no programs planned. So most likely stay at home and rot lor. Anyway, got my ICT schedule liao. So got to start searching for my army stuff. Dunno where i threw them. Hope they are still around somewhere haha. Really sianz leh, got to go back for reservist. Short 1 to 2 days ok lah. But this coming one is a High-Key one. Total of 16 days, excluding weekends. 2 weeks plus, dunno what the hell so long for.

Anyway previously I mentioned something about a Java J2EE course that I was interested to attend at NUS. I finally made up my mind and decided to go ahead with it. As a web programmer, .NET and J2EE is the 2 must-have skills. My current job is already giving me more than enough experience in dot net. Now what I need is J2EE. So this course is just what I need. Course duration is 24 lessons. Fee: $4200 excluding GST. Upon completion of the course, can claim 50% of the course fee from CITREP. So 2++K for a profession diploma from NUS. Not a bad deal right. Lessons start from 6.30 to 9.30, 3 times a week. Hope it wont be too tough for me.

Alright, thanks for tuning in. Ahliyos.

Weekly News came late

Alright, my weekly post came late this week. (suppose to post every sat haha). Anyway, had a bz weekend thats why.

Saturday went to one of my ex-unimelb classmate's place to play a very interesting board game call settlers. Interesting, but kinda of expensive to own one though. Dun ask me to explain the game, I am bad at explaining. (lame excuse right, lol)

Then sunday went to JB with my usual group of friends. Shop n eat alot. Damn, I getting fatter each day. Die IPPT coming.....

So as you can see, i wasn't home much for the whole weekend. So short hor weekend, only 2 days. One week got 2 weekends. If you calcuate in this way right, if 7 years has passed, you only have rest days for as much as just 2 years!!! the other 5 x 365 days you are working !!! Damn, thats long... Of coz, no one calculates in this way lah. But if you think of it, after substracting the handful number of public holidays, we are actually working 64% (4.5/7 * 100) of our lifetime.

We work so hard and our health worsen each day. When we retire, we fall ill and got to pay medical bills with the money we earn in the past. In the end, we get nothing. So I suggest we enjoy what we have now, dun work your head off and suffer in the end. Work for yourself, not because you have too. MONEY ISNT EVERTHING AND LIFE ISNT ABOUT MONEY EITHER.

Anyway, last thursay, went to chong qing streamboat @ suntec for a farewell dinner for our dear little colleague, Meizhen. Little because she's the youngest among us, so she like our little sis. Really can't bear to see her go, coz she a really nice girl. She going to further her studies, so wish her all the best in her studies as well as whatever she do.

Seldom have much pictures in my posts coz i lazy to upload. So here's a few. She's the one in white.


We eating steamboat.


Meizhen & me.


Group foto.

Wireless disappointment

Due my stupid brother who use my desktop pc all the time, so I have been using my laptop all these times. My laptop is the old type of centrino laptops that uses the 802.11b wireless interface. As my room is quite far from the wireless broadband router which is in the living room, my wireless signal is always very low to good. Although the reception is not really bad, I want it to be better. So yesterday I bought a new wireless card: Dlink DWL-G650 802.11g/2.4Ghz Wireless Cardbus Adapter. The expected result is suppose to be quite good, because the router that I am using is also Dlink. Both using Dlink's Air Plus+ technology.

But actual differs quite a lot from my expectations especially since I have spent quite a bit of money on it. (previously I bought a wireless antenna to booast the signal).

Well, I discover that the problem is because of my room. My laptop is deep in the room, a few metres from the corridor of my main hall. Although wireless signals bounce against walls, but nothing beats have the wireless router in line of sight. The signal strength is almost 100%, a good 98%. So conclusion is: the problem lies with the location of my laptop.

Well nvr mind. ANyway, yesterday bought Jolin's latest album - Dancing Diva. First few songs are not bad. Still listening to it at this moment of time though. Not too bad lah, since I bought it off a stall along bugis street for only 7 bucks. Normal retail stores sell them at 19bucks? Quite a good deal I got anyway, and it looks completely original, just that I think it's imported from china or somewhere else.



Oh, did I mention that I took leave yesterday? That's why I got the time to go some shopping at Sim Lim. Yesterday also help Johnson's gf Edina to fix up a pc. Guess what, only 1.2k bucks only leh. Here roughly the specs- P4 3Ghz cpu, 512 DDR2 RAM, 160Gb hdd, dvd-writer, 1.44 floppy drv, 256mb ddr2 radeon (dunno wad model, forgot), a pair of normal speakers and lastly a Phillips 17" LCD. The LCD only 320 bucks leh. Wow. All specs not too bad right and only for 1.2k. Its soooo cheap. But I dun have space for another pc in my room lah, if not i might consider buying one set of myself also hehe.....