Sunday, September 10, 2006

I have an insensible dad

As you all know, I drove up to KL last sat with my dad and mum. During the journey, we only stopped once after the JB check-pt at the 2nd link for a toilet break. My dad walk only for a while, he's panting like hell. Shout at me for his oxygen. I rushed to get the oxygen cylinder out of the car and brought it to him. Then help him to the toilet. I was thinking how is he going to make it to KL like this. I asked him if he can continue anot. As usual, although he is gasping for breath, he violently said yes he can.

So the above para, you can see that my dad isnt fit to go to work at all right. But nobody can change his stubbord mind. My dad can't walk much. After walking a few steps he will start panting and needs to sit down. So long he doesnt exert strength to stand up or walk, he is fine. So he can sit down all day and stay fine.

But if he has to work, he has to walk right! For the past week, every day I fetch my dad to and back from his office. His office is on the 3rd floor. There wasnt a passenger lift, so we took the cargo lift. I had to push along a oxygen concentrator that weights like 50kg or so also. The distance between the office and the cargo lift was not far, but not short neither. Halfway there, my dad has to sit down for a while.

I am been thinking all these times. My dad already work for so many years. Now with his condition, don't he feel tired? I asked him many times, he has he has no choice. He say if he don't go back to work, he will lose his job. I dunno if that is true or not. Nobody will know anyway. Who knows he make this up himself?

Anyway, can see from my dad's face, he is happy to get back to work. After 5 weeks in hospital and 2 mths plus at home, I guessed he must have felt very bored.

So maybe some of you might ask. What did I do when my dad was in office? Relax and go shopping? Go sunway lagoon play water? NO.

My mum and I got to help clean up my dad's condo and packed up things to go home. Why pack up? Is my dad moving back home soon? Nope. He is preparing to move to his new house instead. My dad, i dunno wad he's thinking. He bought a semi-d somewhere in USJ, a area in Selangor. Why of all place buy in Malaysia? How is he going to take care of the house by himself? Who is going to stay there with him? All of us had our commitments in Singapore. How are we going to go there.

Anyway, this story will go on forever lah... I think this post getting alittle too long also liao. So let me talk about our journey back home from KL to SG on Friday.

We left KL around 3pm and I drove quite fast all the way and didnt stop until the toll before the customs at the 2nd-link at JB side.

Again my dad was gasping like hell when he walk to the toilet. I drop him off to park the car first, you see. So again I rushed to get the oxygen tank.

Anyway what make me say I have an insensible dad was what he said to my mum and I when we were just making out way out of KL. I told him the new oxygen concentrator that we have rented is of a older model, and I have already taught mum how to operate. Guess what my dad say? "What are you talking about? Your mother won't be in KL next week? How is she going to operate it?" I replied "Mother is coming back with you what!" He said "Who saying she is coming back, the car no space for her".

My dad going to toban a friend's car back next week and he is crazy enough to plan to come back by his own. C'mon lah, he can't even dress or bathe or cook for himself. How is he going to manage? He said "Bopiah, got to tong lah", meaning no choice got to bear with it. I said "C'mon lah, if that the case, I won't let you go back next week!"

You see how insensible my dad is anot. He actually intend to go back to KL alone. C'mon lah, if he can manage by his own, then why did I took 5 days leave to go down to KL with him?

And the worse thing is he takes everything and everybody for granted. We are all trying to help him, but he don;t feels that way. We thought that after he had gone thru so much and should be lucky to be still alive, yet he still the same hard-headed and stubbord man.

Anyway, he contacted the friend to see if mum can follow along in the car back to KL anot. The friend says can, so at least this thing is settled.

Now I only worried about next week. Coz I wont be there to help, i dunno if my dad can manage with my mum herself anot. My mum also has her own problems with back and leg aches.

Haizz.... Think i stop here today.. Sorry to make you guys read such a long post.... I bet some of you might have skipped it totally, but its ok. I just have so much to say, but dunno say to who.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Jason, don't stress too much k?

From your dad's pt of view, maybe he wants to be independent of all the 'fussing over him' at home. His job in KL is probably something that matters very much to him (may not be the job exactly, but the independent time by himself and being able to take care of himself).

Same as my dad, when in hospital, he cant walk without assistance and should take the wheelchair, but he insist on walking!! Nurse also bo-bian.. haha. It could be ego, or just natural instinct where he still have yi-kou-qi, doesnt want to be deemed useless.

Your dad's temper and stubborness maybe due to his wanting to be independent but yet not able to do so. Try understanding and be more patient with him (I know you very patient already, jia you k? :) )

One thing I know, he loves you and your mum and your family. He cant bear to lose the job right? :)

Free can meet up k. Can find me to chat anytime :)